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Enterprise:Management:Communication

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About the Communications page

The most important skill of an accomplishet PM is communication, about 80% of the time. It is a very important topic in Project Management and we apologize for that little information on this page, which is still under construction. Please stay tuned.
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Communication skills

Here are a few topics, to think about, on how to communicate with other persons.

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Intentional Communication

Did you ever happen to you to profoundly dislike someone, or even feel miserable, because of the way other persons, with whom you interact, sometimes behave? Or being solicited by other persons, in the hope you would render some service or buy something you rather wouldn't? Do these situations frustrate you? Did it also happen to you that you'd walk away or keep your frustration rather than telling such a person what you don't want, dislike and how you would like him/her to behave? This is all about creative, intentional communication. By using straight and respectful talk, communicate to the person, look for way to improve the relation. It is a win-win solution, you'll get performance, cooperation and no longer that miserable feeling of being fed-up with a no-exit situation. Especially you might realize that, for any unpleasant situation, it is not helpful to blame others, but first find in yourself the resources and creativity to find the solution. Being shy, ignoring the other person, is no help in setting straight the relation and sorting out the situation. Rather than shy away, better speak your mind, always with a smile, in all fairness and respect. In other words, communication is sometimes like stepping on a rake. If you adopt the wrong attitude, use the wrong language, if you show your anger and frustration, this will right away bounce hard back to you. Rather than getting the kind cooperation you need, you'll just make the other person defensive, stubborn and disgruntled with your attitude or behavior. After such experiences one might realize that "you never get enough of exactly what you don't want" if you don't look for a different communication style, based on some simple principles:
  • Communication is always and everywhere, conscious or unconscious, verbal or through body-language, and even saying nothing says everything.
  • Communication always has real consequences and results, intended or unintended, immediate or deferred. Always understand your audience, your intentions and be aware of these consequences.
  • Communications is entirely a matter of your choice and responsibility, on how you communicate and what results you get.
  • The results we get in life, in our career, are to a large extent direct consequences of our way of communicating with others. Good communication skills are paramount to success, low stress and satisfaction.
  • Don't ever take personally what other people do, say to or about you. Communication is about a progression of results, not about sparring with words, be always focused on your real intents.
  • To get what you want from another person, the first thing to do is active, purposeful listening.
  • When all else fails, tell "your" truth, your personal one, based on your mindset, culture, perceptions and experience.


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Thinking before talking

The saying goes that "it is easier to put a speeding bullet back into the gun, than to recall words once they have been uttered". Just stop and take a deep breath before talking your sudden anger, dislike or disdain. Instead, assume you might be wrong. Be curious, ask for more information and truly listen and sincerely intend to learn something about the other person. This is what Albert Einstein was saying on the matter, with a playful but truthful formula. He said, "If A = success, the formula is A = X + Y with X being work, Y being play and Z, keeping your mouth shut.”

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Effective negotiation tips

Effective negotiation is not a power game or contest of wills, nor is it a game of trying to outsmart the other. Instead it is based on fairness of rules and outcomes for each party. There are 4 key ingredients to effective negotiation:
  • People - separate them from the issues, stay away from taking or turning things personally on you or the other person. As Steven Covey was saying, Seek first to understand, then, to be understood, by being soft on people but hard on issues.
  • Interests - focus on others' interests rather than their positions, that are hiding compatible and conflicting real-life needs and interests.
  • Options - honestly work with the other party to explore and develop fair options and don't rush to comments, judgements, conclusions and decisions until taking the time to thoroughly explore all possibilities. Look for areas of agreement, for options of low-cost for you but valuable for the other person.
  • Rules - if you want negotiation rather than fighting, agree upon fairness rules and state first your preferred outcome. Being fair and listening builds trust, sets forth your values and boundaries and teach people to treat you fairly as well. Hard-nose bargaining creates winners and losers,resent and disatisfaction, while negotiation creates only winners.


Resources for effective negotiation

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About silence and its golden ways

A Zen phrase says, "To see, you must get out of the middle of the picture", meaning by that "get out of the middle of yourself". Each of us is an "island" consisting of our own unique history, experience, vocabulary and information coding/decoding system. Listening is a powerful force for releasing potential in others when we understand the other person's points of view, ideas and attitudes, the person's feelings and frame of reference regarding the issues at stake. Listening and being interested in other people will make you a lot more friends than by just trying to get other people interested in you. Intentional listening builds relationships, make people cooperate and even reduces your own stress. It is however fascinating how many people have all the answers before they've heard the question. In fact most people do not listen for understanding but for replying, they are focused on their internal "monologue" and already have all these answers. Other people try to be interesting rather than being interested, forgetting that successful communication comes from being a curious person, interested in what other people have to share. You can make people feel you understand by using the "perception checking" questions, by being compassionate and by making the other person feel special by being genuinely interested by his/her story. In fact the root of the word "listen" comes from Middle English, and means, "to merge." But the modern definition, according to Webster's, is "to make a conscious effort to hear; to attend closely.". This is how:
  • Listen with a purpose, be aware and honest to yourself on the reasons you are listening to the other person, even when your second thought is that these reasons are mean or laughable and you know you are just predending (that's called human condition).
  • Try hard to listen for understanding and not evaluation, be aware of your own communication filters, mindset and framing patterns, don't get upset if you dislike the other person's oppinions, language or attitude, there might be good reasons, that you should explore.
  • Be aware of your own language, attitude or behavior that make you devensive, exercise emotional control, know your "hot buttons" and don't let them pushed when interacting with other people, even when your first reaction is frustration and anger.
  • Concentrate on what your interlocutor is saying, stop your distracting internal monologue, focus your attention on your interlocutor.


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The Power of the words

Words have a life of themselves, they carry power and meanings, can soothe or hurt. A Chinese saying goes that "Respect the power of words, choose them with care". Words can create or deny realities or possibilities, they carry your feelings and attitudes, they can shape lives and careers. Let's think what one gets when you say "I can’t do that..". It's that you are choosing not to do it, although you could. "I have to...", by the same token, indicates a choice. There is a big difference in believing that you have or ought to do something and, on the other hand, knowing that you are actually choosing to do something. Words you use have to be aligned with your inner truth and feelings, therefore better become aware of implications behind words and statements, by listening to your own words as you were in someone else's shoes.

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Shooting from the lips

Words can easily be used as weapons. Shooting one with words is a very dangerous matter though, especially when missing the target or wounding innocent bystanders. Quick, unthought remarks can bring about irreversible disasters. There are no neutral word or comments, instead every word of comment has consequences, good or bad, for you or others. Words cannot be "recalled" and often the first impression you make is also the last. This is even trickier when talking to people whose values and customs were shaped by other cultures, as you might say what you just don't mean to. True also about the body language. (TODO)

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Asking the right question

How many times happened to you to get fearful, angry or frustrated by someone else's behavior or actions and your first reaction to be making the other person wrong? Usually, frustation or anger make us ask questions like "Why did you do this?" or "Why didn't yo do that?", then start arguing about every detail of what happened. Making the other person wrong, although it might help venting frustration, does not help solving a situation, especially if you have no other choice or intention but to keep getting along with the other person. Before speaking out your anger, try to ask yourself, in all fairness and honesty, what are your real intentions and possibilities with respect to the unwanted situation. Instead of making someone wrong, try to think of asking those "powerful" questions that would stimulate and inspire the other person to learn, get insight, be creative and try to solve the problem. Ask yourself a few questions about the root cause of what went wrong and you might even realize that you are part of the problem. This is why powerful questions are hard to ask and even harder to get answered. The "powerful" questions to ask never start with "why", rather,to defuse defensifeness and hint to the joint search for a solution, they start with "what", "when", "how", etc. And, when asking them, one has to wait for the answer and listen it carefully.

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Creating a positive environment

Looking at one's past is useful as a learning experience, but we are not necessarily defined nor bounded by our past. We have the power to choose from possibilities existing all around us and bring them into our present, as realities. Realizing the fact that we are empowered to bring into the present, as tangible realities, our future, uncertain possibilities, will release our creative energies, with benefic effects on our everyday life, work and relationships. To do that we must realize the difference between the events that happen to or around us and the interpretation we make of them. The event and the interpretation aren't one and the same thing, as events have no meaning in themselves. It's up to us to attach negative or positive meanings to events, to words we are told, to attitudes toward us. Creating a positive environment around is primarily a matter of becoming aware of these interpretations, questioning and reshaping them. Being positive about interpreting events around us, realizing the potential we have to materialize possibilities, will go a long way in helping us to better communicate with the persons around us.

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Communicationg across cultural barriers

Communicating and especially negotiating across barriers of language, culture and values, can be a challenging experience. What is deemed normal business behavior in North America, in terms of interaction, verbal and body language, might be considered offensive and irrespectful in other cultures, rooted in traditions. Have you ever thought that not being exuberant and genuinely interested of your South-American business partner's family or preferred soccer team, might be interpreted as offensive, unfriendly behavior on your part? Did ever happen to you to be answered "yes", with a large, friendly smile, whatever you say, by a person who grew-up in one of the ancient asiatic cultures, where interrupting someone or saying "no" is considered impolite? Beeing aware or not of these cultural peculiarities might make the difference between success and failure when dealing with business partners, bosses or co-workers. Here are some resources:
  • Understanding Eastern & Western Culture and Business Practices [1]
  • Harvard Business Shool article on "Negotiating in China" - the "guanxi" principle [2]


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Effective business communication

Communication is paramount in business, it can make the difference between success and failure. Here are some topics.

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Effective business presentations

The art of effectively delivering a presentation in front of an audience is a key factor of success in business. Delivering a good presentation relies not only on its contents but especially on the ways the message is passed, including form, verbal and body language and connection to the audience. Here are some resources to help on becoming an effective presenter:

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Toastmasters International

Toastmasters members tune-up their presentation skills through group sessions, by speaking to, and being supported by groups. Toastmasters is organized into regional clubs, each one made up of 20 to 30 people who meet once a week for about an hour. All started in 1924, in the basement of the YMCA in Santa Ana, California, where the club was deemed to: “ afford practice and training in the art of public speaking and in presiding over meetings, and to promote sociability and good fellowship among its members”. Each meeting gives everyone an opportunity to practice and there is a progression of awards, from "Competent Communicator" (CC) to "Distinguished Toastmaster" (DTM). Members are trained to be effective in:
  • Conducting meetings, covering the basic meeting procedures, delivering impromptu or prepared speeches on assigned topics, speech organization, voice, persuasion, verbal and body language.
  • Constructive evaluation on speeches delivered by fellow members.


Toastmasters International has currently 10,500 clubs and more than 200,000 members in approximately 90 countries. Various educational materials are available through the Toastmasters International Supply Catalog, members also receive the monthly publication, "The Toastmaster magazine".

Here is the link to the main page of the organization and here its Montreal chapters.

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Landmark Education

The Landmark Education LLC, a private US company, aims its self-development and communication courses mainly to individuals. The introductory 40-hour "Landmark Forum" course provides to individuals a practical model of approaching everyday life through the art of uncovering and expanding self-knowledge and unforeseen ways of being. The subsidiary company "Landmark Education Business Development" (LEBD) markets and delivers training and consulting to organizations. The methodology Landmark Education is using, fiercely contested by some, praised by other, has its roots in the controversial EST training patented by Werner Erhard and Associates. Landmark's phylosophy, as it tries to fill the void in the lives of disillusioned youth, inherently has theological implications and might be a topic of concern for the religious establishment and might even be likened to a cult by some cult-watch organizations. However it is indeniable that troubled individuals successfuly changed their lives after attending the Landmark Forum and companies succeeded in mobilizing employees following training organized bay Landmark's business division LEBD.

Some more interesting references about Landmark:
  • Skeptic's dictionary page on Landmark Forum
  • Alex Churchill's personal oppinion pages on Landmark
  • Todd Gehman's personal experience page on his 3-day training sesion with Landmark Forum


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Mind Mapping

The Mind Mapping communication methodology relies on the old "one image is worth one thousand words" and is used to clarify ideas by visually representing and linking them around one or more central key concepts. Mind maps are useful in structuring the problem solving and decision making processes. Here are some resources:
  • Mindjet MindManager Pro Mind-Mapping toolset
  • FreeMind open-source Mind-Mapping software which is faster than MindManager
  • MyMap - a Unix-based Mind-Mapping tool, currently orphaned


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Body Language

The non-verbal communication (aka "body language") accounts for more than 50% of what we communicate. It may often betray our feelings or send cues about our real thoughts and it is much harder to control than its verbal counterpart. Here are a few useful resources:
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